First off, I’d like to thank you for the positive feedback in relation to my previous post. It’s a big book, so I hope to have a post by this upcoming week. It’s absolute gold in terms of life applicable knowledge from what I’ve read so far.
I’m writing to you at 12 am my time because I think there’s something you the readers need to know about me. I have bipolar type 2. Those unfamiliar with the condition, don’t jump to assumptions. I’m not a raging maniac who needs to go to a psych hospital asap. I’m just someone who rarely knows what it’s like to be steady. To be baseline. It’s either mania (increased mood, sometimes to euphoria, increased confidence, and quick to aggression and impulsivity) or depression (depression comes in varying degrees but bipolar depression is always moderate to severe).
I’ve been on every medication for treating this condition that you can name. I immediately rejected them after some trial and error because antipsychotic medications have tons of very serious side effects (quick massive weight gain, apathy/lifeless, permanent twitches of muscles, and sometimes death; lamictal can cause this if you have a reaction to it that develops a rash. Once off the medication, the weight loss and immediate joy I had in every day activities made me falsely believe I made the right choice. Well, since 2012 (When I starting taking and stopping medication) until now, I went from being 150 pounds to 192. I have failed out of college due to compulsive casino trips and abusing stimulants. I have lost many great friends and they won’t even give me a chance to talk to them. I went from having all the promise in the world if I applied myself to working a mindnumbing job, hoping there is a way out.
Now, why am I telling you all this? 1. Because I don’t want to be some stranger to you. I can’t expect you to trust me if I don’t give something back. 2. To reassure you that I am currently on a medication again to minimize symptoms, but also to reassure you that if you’ve been reading my posts, that I’m very intelligent and can be a great asset to you. Just because I have emotional ups and downs does not mean I can’t provide great knowledge and tips. 3. To let you know that I’m right there with you. I want to improve just as much as you do and with your help, we both can attain real lasting improvement. And no I don’t mean money. I mean contentment. Being ok with yourself because you know you’ve pushed yourself to take chances. I’m a work in progress like everyone else and I’ll prove to you which each upcoming post I provide, that you made a life-altering by following this site. Bold claim? It’s not. Wait and see.
As Always Best Wishes,